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REAL TALK | SELF-LOVE & BODY POSITIVITY

March 19, 2016

Self-love & body positivity ADYSS MEETS

One thing I have really wanted to talk about is self-love, including body positivity. As we are all human beings, we thrive on visual beauty. It’s a fact. We love to visualize everything and want everything in our (fantasy) world to be looking perfect, making ourselves no exception to this. Therefore I would like to share my own opinion, genuinely hoping to offer some enlightenment in our often media twisted society…

At first I was scared to write or even talk (!) about this topic. I was convinced that high fashion magazines like ELLE & Vogue were already treating these issues in the midst of their pages. But as a beauty blogger, I quickly realized that I have the responsibility to boost body positivity and a sense of well-being in general. I come across too many bloggers & celebrities online who do little to nothing to help their community. That’s their choice, which I respect, but I would do those things differently. I might be walking on sensitive, dangerous grounds here, but I think that anyone in a position of power should try to use their voice for the greater good. However, I’m losing my point of focus here. I’m not writing this blog post in order to sound bitter, snarky or jealous – not at all, I’m neither of those three.

Back to the topic: self-love and body positivity. Self-love has often been seen as a moral flaw, a tendency of vanity and narcissism. But really, what does loving oneself actually mean? Are we talking about pamper sessions, buying a luxury beauty product for yourself? Not in my opinion. Self-love is not a destination, it’s a practice. Something we should do every day, like brushing our teeth. It should be the norm, the standard in our visual society.

What I like most about blogging is the writing part, I absolutely love writing. Another special thing that comes with blogging is the way to communicate my thoughts with other people. People who might feel the same way or entirely different about a subject – but that’s OK. We don’t have to share the same opinion, and we will still be able to talk about it in a professional way.

Throughout many years I absolutely neglected myself. I let people tell me off and treat me quite badly, but I always accepted it to ”improve” myself. When I look back now, I ask myself: what was I even thinking? No one should accept bad behaviour nor neglect their own needs – not in a relationship, nowhere.

For me, self-love is choosing ourselves, telling what is true or not, giving our body the rest it needs, building a life we love, wearing clothing we like, spending quality time with ourselves, following our intuition and most importantly: accepting ourselves when we fail miserably and wish we could start all over again from scratch. Now, please don’t go out and buy all the designer bags you’ve ever wanted just yet. That’s not a responsible thing to do. Financial responsibility is a form of self-love as well!

Another thing I wanted to talk about is body positivity. I would like to tell ALL of you that you are beautiful, no matter your size. Stop hating your body, start embracing it. As a skinny guy, I often get comments such as ”oh, but you’re so skinny! You should eat more”. It annoys me terribly whenever a person tells me something like this. I don’t need your opinion on my body or eating habits – I’m healthy & happy with my body, isn’t that all that matters? Of course, I would never encourage anyone to endanger their own health. It’s never a good thing to endanger yourself due to your size, whether it’s bigger or smaller than usual.

We all have this incredible body with amazing functions that brings us places. None of us should hate our body, even if it has its flaws. I have flaws. I have prominent scarring and depigmentation on my body that are not pretty to the eye. However, I could go hating myself, wishing it would be different (it won’t be) or I can say: OK, this is my body, and I love it for everything it does. In the end, hate goes nowhere. Hate is such a waste of time & energy that you can transform to positive vibes instead. Try to promote positivity all around you by telling people how beautiful they are, and the excellent work they do. There shouldn’t be any shame to be proud of yourself and others.

Lastly, ”everything will be okay” is such an awful excuse – you are much more than just ”okay”. You are a diamond in the rough, a fantastic individual. You can do anything you set your mind to! There are a million opportunities out there waiting for you. The only thing you need to do is put on your best shoes and start walking.

Much love,

Adyss

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